Theoretical Chaos
Saturday, July 31, 2010

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7:04 PM ; smile'

Dear Idol,
You are so awesome. I can't think of anything wrong with you (but that might just be cause I don't know you well.) You're so involved in everything and you do good in school, you're musically talented in more ways than one. You walk and talk so confidently and I wish I had such confidence. You're really social and you're such a nice person and despite all this awesomeness, you're not big headed or all high and mighty but stay modest but not annoyingly compliment-fishing modest.. if that makes sense?
If you were mean enough you would be the person that would say to me "anything you can do I can do better". But you're not mean cause you're awesome :P Yeah... not much else to say other than WHY BE SO COOL FOR HUH? :P
Love Lots, Kyleen

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6:43 PM ; smile'

Thursday, July 29, 2010

So the workshop today was about drink driving and stuff and how the guy lost his son and stuff. It was so sad. The way he said it. Like "He killed my boy from behind". And he continuously referred to him as 'my boy' and when he showed pictures of him, he seemed so proud to have him as a son. It was so sad :'( And the video of the guy that was talking about falling down and not being able to get back up; THAT was incredibly inspirational. Someone linked me to a longer version of that video before and it was so... wow :P yes. Wow. Cause I cannot think of a better adjective.
Omgsh it's birthday season ! Sooo many people are turning 16 and i feel slack ause im not getting anyone anything cause im broke and last year i spent too much on birthday presents and my mum got sorta angry so yea :S I wish I left the present buying to this year when people turned 16. It would have made so much more sense. LONG CARDS INSTEAD YES? :D


6:09 PM ; smile'

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Dear Santa,
I miss you giving me presents every Christmas :( It's been so long since you've been a part of my life. Thanks for the wii and the soccer ball and everything else you gave me though :D My daddy took over your job ! :O
Love Lots, Kyleen

Dear Tooth Fairy,
Thank you for giving me coloured pencils from pizza hut that one time when I was little :P I ran out of baby teeth !
Love lots, Kyleen

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6:58 PM ; smile'

Monday, July 26, 2010

Did anyone catch the Japanese people at our school today? Lisa did. And she ran over and talked to them. The language barrier was amusing :P Most of the time was spent staring at each other with blank looks trying to say something but not quite being able to. eventually we established that Lisa's name was Lisa and some guy was like "hello, my name is yuu tanaka!" I applaud his bravery :P I miss doing Japanese. I wish I could talk to them. Well. Like really well. All I managed to say in japanese was "Do you like Australia?" And the guy said an entire sentence so i just smiled and nodded :P
I love jamming at lunch cause randoms join in and it's fun :D I love singing with Wendy cause we have similar taste in music.. most of the time :P But I totally got upstaged by her man D: I love how the entire group just burst into song when Thai started playing Baby xD
you know you know you know I'd never ask you to change.
If perfect's what you're searching for then just stay the


8:14 PM ; smile'

Dear Johnny,
Thanks for being such an awesome older brother and being as insightful as you are. For putting up with my bad moods and my need to annoy someone for the fun of it. The constant hitting, kicking, biting etc :P For the many wake up calls at 5.30 just to annoy me ==' For getting to school early during the half yearly period to keep me company while cramming. For letting me talk to your niece even though she thinks im boring :( For keeping me company in maths and damn I didn't think I would think of this many things to be thankful for :P
I didn't really start talking to you until last year? maybe year 8? YES! Year 8 cause you made my armbands smell like lynx ! But we didn't get close until end of last year-beginning of this year. And im glad we did :) You amuse me so and you make maths really fun :D I've learned that white out stains clothes thanks to you ==' You help me get things in maths when im staring at the numbers going wth ? O_O"
Despite the fact that we annoy the hell out of each other just for the fun of it, our DnMs are awesome :D And even though im so indecisive, you still listen to me and make really... unbiased comments and say exactly what you think. Damn, you put up with a lot of crap from me :P I mean, usually its you that witnesses my.. bouts of giggliness when certain.. people walk past :P
So basically what I've been trying to say in this long ass and yet pointless birthday card that doesn't really say much at all is that I'm glad we're close and I hope we still stay close for a while :)
Love Lots, K the flying archer... eh i forgot the rest. YOU FINISH IT BOY!


6:37 PM ; smile'

Friday, July 23, 2010

These letters are mean. The titles call for a lot of over lapping of people but I don't want to double up on people so I'll just write to my cousin in Perth... who I never talk to.
Dear Terrence,
How are you? Hows William? I have only met you twice when you visited us. And both times, I barely talked to you so I'm not quite sure what to say here. Um I guess it would have been nice to have you live closer then I could have had a guy cousin living close rather than beigns urrounded by girls who feel the need to be all secretive around me cause I was the youngest and wouldn't get what they were talking about...
I don't know much about you tbh except you put CS on my computer and somehow put a virus on there too. Thanks for that.... Your son is really cute. And he seems pretty intelligent. And he speaks in third person :P I miss that kid... Coming back any time soon? It's not like you're going to reply to this so these questions are pointess...
Love Lots, Kyleen

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7:52 PM ; smile'

Thursday, July 22, 2010

I'll make the first move and you'll probably respond one of two ways. If you reciprocate the feelings and do what needs to be done, we can smile and live happily ever after. But if you do nothing, I'll fall back into the lonesome pit I dug for myself, waiting hoping that you'll find me and pull me back up. But you won't. You won't even notice. Cause you never did. So why would things change now?


8:55 PM ; smile'

I did my English speech today and managed to cut off 15 seconds of my speech.. damn nerves make me speak faster :( Ah well. It was four minutes.. well close enough :D
I was in an unnaturally good mood today.. sorta. I think. Well considering the mood I should be in (what with the speech, school etc) I guess I was in a good mood. Ag was fun. Luke and I (mostly Luke) are an awesome goat whispering team ;P I love the goats. They're so cute. But they made me race them to the gate. Like we were in the Goat shed and they started walking down the lane that connects to the paddock and then about three of them get out and me and Luke were like... "sir.. they're leaving !" and he's just like "its ok let them go just close that gate down there." and it was waaaaaaaay down there so I had to run there and the goats saw me running towards them so they started running and yes.. twas an epic race. Or would have been if they didn't stop running halfway down 8-)
Luke managed to get two goats back in the shed just by saying "get back in the shed". Oh that pro :P Yes.. we like to think his words made an impact... There's a part of the farm that we went to today that I have never seen before. It was so neat and green and all all the paddocks were nice ancd clean and they all had calves and it reminded me of those montagues in movies. The ones that are of the country side or a petting zoo that's meant to be really pretty and nice comapred to some dodgy place that the person/animal concerning the montague is in... if that makes sense. But yeah. It was really pretty with a concrete footpath and the calves were just frollicking around in their bright green pens. I found it amazing... O_O


5:59 PM ; smile'

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Dear person I miss,
I miss you (oh captain obvious strikes again.. I got that from someone but I forgot who, might have been Mr Josep :P anyway...). You are so far away and I can't believe I'm getting used to it. I don't want to go into too much detail cause yeah... what's the point right?
You've been in Singapore for over a year now and the house is so quiet O_O. I miss your 'otay's and your big eyes and your other baby like ways. I miss the way I'd be playing guitar and you and kathleeny would start singing with that automatic harmonisation. I miss the random dancing around in the house, your smell staining your room (which I have now taken over >=]) and your odd praise of Serenade. I just miss you ok? Do I NEED a reason? Please come home soon cause I want my big sister back :(
Love Lots, Ate Icecream ;D
P.s. Lets jam together when you get back like we used to otay?

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9:28 PM ; smile'

There's no point in looking sad,

because the people who would

have cared
are all gone


3:43 PM ; smile'

Sunday, July 18, 2010

And when the

awkward moment

comes when one of us

falls out of love, then what?


6:45 PM ; smile'

Friday, July 16, 2010

Dear far far away,
The amount of people that I have drifted away from is rather large so I'm picking you because I want to mention you in one of these letters and I dont think any other heading will allow for it :P So dear primary school best friend. What happened? Oh thats right, we grew up. At first I thought hey that won't matter, we've been best friends since kindy so we'll still be able to re establish that best friendship right? But I don't think it's that easy. In the past 3-4 years that I havent seen you, with one year in separate countries does things. And the fact that we dfon't go to the same school isn't really helping. And meeting new people, growing apart, lack of communication.. yeah didn't seem likely.
But I know we will still have a friendship. Because we've had too many memories to let it go. I sorta miss it though. But judging from what I've seen of you, our personalities will probably clash. So I think we can be close friends again but maybe not BEST. I dno. I can't see it happening. But then again, maybe thats just me and my negativity :P
Love Lots, Kyleen
P.s. thanks for all the good times :)

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10:19 PM ; smile'


8:06 PM ; smile'

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Dear ___,

There's no point in writing this letter cause I know you forgive me. For everything I have ever done, cause you're just like that and I love that you are. Thanks for accepting me everytime I went wrong and guiding me. Putting me on the right path etc. There are so many things in my life that I can be thankful for and it's all because of you.

Your forgiveness means the world to me and it always will (woah! I just used always ! There's a reason for that...). Honestly, despite the fact that you are all forgiving, I'm afraid to face you when I go wrong so I am trying my hardest not to give myself a reason to fear you. I love you. that's the reality of it and there are so many legit reasons why I should so addressing this letter to someone I wish could forgive me is pointless because I know you do.

Love Lots, Kyleen

P.s. This video never fails to make me teary :P

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4:55 PM ; smile'

I was cleaning my stuff out of my old room into my new room (even though I've been in this room for most of this year, I only JUST finished taking everything) and woah. I was looking through some of the stuff and it's pretty funny how much useless junk I used to keep :P I threw out so much today and it made me sad cause I'm really sentimental and I hate getting rid of thigns. I threw away an entire Ag book ! Shock .

But I love tidying things up and seeing the end result. I never noticed how many books I had O_O They are now on my desk shelf thingy and while I was putting them on, I realised just how OCD I can be. I couldn't decide how to order them. I went with height cause it looks neater and I hate seeing bookshelves with books that are really randomly placed. I mean even if it's alphabetical order, the fact that the height of each book changes randomly annoys me. Conveniently enough, the wider books were sorta taller as well (for most of them) so it made my life a lot easier. Although, it took me ages to decide whether I should colour code them too. Yes. I am that OCD. Leave me alone ><

Woo... a whole paragraph on books. Exciting stuff right there :P Ok, I shall stop boring you kids now.


4:44 PM ; smile'

Yesterday was so much fun but I cannot be bothered going into detail. But Joesph and Thai:

  1. The rabbids from rayman do NOT look like Homer Simpson!

  2. The Da Vinci code is a good movie.

  3. Anchorman was boring.

  4. What happened to my room being too messy to look at? =="


Ok that last one... I have a question. Does this remind you of anyone?


11:23 AM ; smile'

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Dear Painful Person,
When we first started talking, I never thought that you'd cause me this much pain. Heh. Another reason why I dont talk about the future as if it's a certainty. Anyway, you did. And I know it probably started with me and the things I may have said or done but after we talked about it, I was sorta hoping things would go back to normal. But I guess it just isn't that easy huh? I miss you a lot though. And it hurts that every time I try to make things the way they were, you brush me off or say something that makes me not want to be with you because the conversation falls into this awkward, uncomfortable ditch that I can never get out of. And this, mdear is the reason why I haven't been spending as much time with you as I used to. There was another reason.. earlier on but I don't remember it anymore.
You know what though? I thought that you would be the most understanding and that things wouldn't change TOO much but I must have pushed you over the edge huh?
Love Lots, Lopez
P.s. I miss you. That's all I'm going to say now.

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8:52 PM ; smile'

Monday, July 12, 2010


6:55 PM ; smile'

Dear you,
I never met you but from what I heard you were cheeky and happy. You apparently had a really nice voice. I don't really know what I would have odne if I DID have a chance to know you or what our relationship would be like cause I've never really given it a thought. But now that I am, it would have been nice to know you I think and possibly have that tight knit grandpa-grandaughter relationship. Now that I AM thinking about it, it makes me sad taht we didn't even get a chance to have any sort of relationship. If I could meet or talk to you now, I don't know what i'd say. All I know is that I'd have wanted the chance to be able to get to know you and the apparent cheeriness you bring to the family.
Love Lots, Kyleen
P.s We'll have our chance eventually...

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6:47 PM ; smile'

Sunday, July 11, 2010

So I went to church just the in my primary school and usually we go to my sisters old High School but we decided to go at night today.. for some reason. Anyway, it was nostalgic. I forgot what my school looked like. Not really, but I never had a reason to pull the image out so seeing it today with all these changes was so O_O
It makes me realise how much time has actually gone by. waaaaah I hate time and thinking about the past/future. The past makes me miss what used to be and the future makes me scared of what could be. Now is that melodramatic or what? :P
On another, more random note, MARION GOT OUT OF MASTERCHEF! Yeah it happened a while ago and im pretty late with this blog but seriously AARON BEAT HER?? THAT'S NOT RIGHT! I watched her on The Circle and 7PM Project and the poor girl was continuously being told that she was the clear favourite. If I were her and I heard all that stuff, I'd feel worse cause I'd be thinking "WHAT? I was the best and got owned? What is this ><" etcetc.


7:01 PM ; smile'

Should I start saving the world?


7:00 PM ; smile'

Dear Anon,
You seem so cool and there's something about you that just makes me want to know you. You are so cute and quiet and I've had a few conversations with you before but, as the title would imply, I want to talk to you more :P I remember the last time we talked at Diem's party, you kept giggling while you were eating and I just found that so incredibly cute that I started laughing at you. I think the fact that I'm so loud compared to you kinda ruins the whole "lets talk more" thing cause then it's more me talking AT you not TO you. But yeah, I shall tone it down until we get closer yeaaah? ;D
And you seem really... moral-orientated. If that makes sense :S Like you're a good kid and I think I should surround myself with people like you. You have the cutest smile and I just want to make you my little sibling. Yes. I'm saying sibling cause specifiyng a gender would make this too guessable :P Oh and I'm sorry for not keeping my promise to wake up that time I was meant to but I WAS SO TIRED FROM THE NIGHT BEFORE !!! Ok, you don't even read my blog so you won't even get that msg :P
SO ! All in all, I think you're adorable and sweet, let's talk, I'll try not to be too eccentric and be my little sibling please :D
Love Lots Kyleen
P.s. I still have your ID card !!

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5:23 PM ; smile'

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Dear persn I want to meet,
I want to meet you.
Love Lots, Kyleen
P.s I could not be bothered thinking about someone I wanted to meet :P

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9:32 PM ; smile'

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Dear Top Disagree Person,
hrm, not sure if you go under this category cause we're now friends in real life as well. Although, we did sorta start online so you get this spot :P My dearest gaming advisor, you have taught me ooh so much. You come out with these random bits of information that I find incredibly amusing. you're such an awesome and relaxed guy who's open to... well... quite a lot of things :P
You're so easy to get along with and you are incredibly adorkable. (Just ask my sister and cousin O_O) You know, the weird thing is, you have probably seen most of my people/house... that's a tad weird but whatever... Thankyou for being such an awesome friend who passes on all your computer knowledge :D It's cool that you know so much an dare willing to help everyone else. Oh and you're one of the few guys that I know who can actually multitask WELL.
You know, despite the fact that we disagree on a lot of stuff (music, movies etc) we get along pretty well. I think. I hope :S But you know, you could like not-so secretly hate me :O CUUUUUT anywho, I remember earlier this year when we used to talk heaps, well we still do but yknow we used to talk like A LOT and I forgot where that sentence was going...
This is a really poorly written letter... sorry :P But you know, even though you say you're not the heartfelt kinda guy, when I was annoyed before, you'd let me rant to you or punch you and you would just listen or take it. Even though you didn't really say much, you still made me happier cause you'd manage to distract me from whatever was annoying me in the first place.
So all in all, thanks for being so fun, awesome, relaxed and approachable. Sorry if I annoyed you at any stage during the past year or so and thanks for introducing me to conquer ;D yaaaaay !
Love Lots, Kyleeny
P.s. Bleach is still better than Naruto !!

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7:29 PM ; smile'

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Dear Danger Warning,
I don't know why this even happened. I mean, yeah you were nice and everything but it didn't really make sense. I barely knew you. Honestly, I think it was more of a... fascination. That sounds really slack but if someone were to ask me "How much did you like him?" I wouldn't be able to answer because in all honesty, the whole itme you were a part of my life, there was still this nagging thought in the back of my head saying "What the hell are you doing ?"
Don't get me wrong, you're pretty cool, a bit immature, a tad clingy but the thing that made me decide you weren't worth it was some of the things you said. Let's not specify cause NO ONE knows. So maybe we are better as friends, despite the fact that I don't think we're even that anymore. But hey, I saw you the other day and you seemed pretty good so what's stopping us from being friends again? Me. That's what. It's hard for me to let go of the past and I'm sorry that you had to suffer but I'm happy with the decisions I made now. And you seem to be too. So who knows, maybe one day we shall be on speaking terms again. Unless you hate me THAT much.
Love lots, Kyleen
P.s. Word of warning, don't try convincing a girl to go against her values over little things. It doesn't send a good message when it comes to bigger things.

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2:33 PM ; smile'

Monday, July 5, 2010

Dear Stranger,
The good thing about strangers is that they know nothing about you and so there perception is not based on anything but what you give them. Sometimes it's good to have someone to talk to who has this lack of knowledge about you because a non-existent perception cannot be changed.So, stranger I wonder who you are and what you'll become to me, what our relationship will be like or if we'll ever have a relationship. You could walk by me and I wouldn't even care. Each person has a story, I wodner how much of yours I'll find out. Everyone starts out was a stranger and most people stay that way, but you know, let's defy the odds and be jolly good friends.. or enemies :P Not srue cause this letter could be addressed to anyone !
Love Lots, Kyleen
P.s. Only time will tell :D

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9:26 PM ; smile'

Sunday, July 4, 2010

She woke up. Rather suddenly, with tears streaming down her face. There was a reason for her abrupt wake. Something she was dreaming about. She couldn't remember it. Bright lights, A sudden warmth and loud noises. The images were slipping out of her mind the more she tried to hold on but she could figure out what they depicted. She rolled over and looked at her bedside clock. 10:28. She should get up. She couldn't just lay in bed all day and wallow in self pity. The date struck her though. It was that date. It brought back too many painful memories.
A stream of sound and pictures filled her mind. A rushed hug as he got on the train, endless laughter as she tripped over, a passionate kiss on the stairs to her apartment and a quick kiss on his cheek as she turned away crying. It all came crashing down on her. The reality of the loss. What she let go of. What she caused. He was gone from her life now and there was no way of getting him back. She had no one to blame but herself. She pushed him away. Her persistence, the way she would constantly irritate him, her impatience and her annoyingly secretive nature. It was all her. There was no denying that fact. And she couldn't help but think what if?
She got out of bed and looked around, not quite sure what she was going to do with her day. It was funny. It had been almost a month, many would expect her to be over it and yet, she couldn't even bring herself to bring down memories of him. She didn't know where he was. She wanted to send a postcard. Or a letter. But she doubted that a letter would be enough to tell him everything she wanted to say. It would be more of a novel. She laughed at her own pathetic humour.

Dear Leo-

She couldn't do it. It's not like he would ever get it anyway. So what was the use? She scrunched it up and threw it aside. She grabbed a coat and walked outside. It was chilly but she liked it that way and it looked like it was going to rain. Good. Let them pour, it would blend in with her tears anyway. She made her way to the spot she had revisited countless times since... that day.

It was a rather beautiful field, despite the fact that it held so much loneliness. She heard a car skid on a turn. Be careful, she wanted to say, it's wet and you might crash. Like we did. She had been dreaming about that night ever since it happened. It was their anniversary but her, being the ungrateful delinquent she is, pushed him over the edge. It was raining and as he turned to yell at her, he didn't see the approaching traffic. Bright lights, the sudden warmth of his arms around her and loud noises with no differentiation. She remained conscious during the whole thing. Hysterical but she had felt the warmth of his body on hers. She had heard him breathing. Heavily and painfully.

And now, she was left with regret. The fact that she never said the things she should have. Didn't treat him as well as she knew he deserved. Became everything she hated in all the other girls he ever dated and never, not once, told him she loved him and really, honestly meant and felt it. She never got to thank him for being everything she wanted, for being so sweet, dorky and chivalrous. She never said why she loved him. She didn't show him either. And, despite the fact that they had fought minutes before the crash, the last thing he did was hold her.

The tears began to fall faster now. She cursed herself for not being able to show him just how much he meant to her. She sat down on the wet grass, her fingers brushing against the cold, smooth stone. She wept freely as she looked down at the name imprinted on the headstone:

Leo Chang;

May 18th 1986 - June 4th 2010

"If angels and demons were to walk this earth,

I'd still hold you close to me,
I'd die in your arms and cherish each breath

and let my love show you everything"


6:44 PM ; smile'

Man this 30 day letter challenge requires so much botheration ==" sorry for the inconsistence. But they WILL all get there... eventually. Meanwhile, have you guys realised that this year has gone unbelievably fast? IT'S CRAZY ! I feel like hardly anything has happened, and yet when you think about it, a LOT has happened this year.
But that's a persona observation. I need something to make me start taking this year seriosuly. Cause every week feels like it's still the start of term and to me, the start of term is never taken seriously :P What a bad attitude... ANother realisation, my blogs are so poorly written these days. The paragraphs start and end randomly and the subject is really inconsistent and I get off topic really easily... it's like me in the real world !
I need something to do these holidays while I'm at home. NO MUM! CLEANING THE HOUSE WILL NOT CURE MY BOREDOM. Am I the only one whose parents tell me to clean if I'm so bored? meh... Anyway, I've started reading this manga called Absolute Boyfriend. It sounds really weird and it is. At the start. And if you read the synopsis you'll all probably be like "omgsh she's a pervert !" but in between all the pervertedness (I swear to you there isn't much), it's actually really sweet ^^ And the main girl reminds me of Orihime from Bleach. Except shorter and younger. But yeah, I suggest you read it :D
AND, I'm getting bored of my current games. Yes Thai, I know I said conquer was to me what DotA is to you BUT unlike you, I have control :P I get bored easily. After I get to a certain point in a game (either really pro or too noob to keep going and I cbb getting better), I just stop playing. gah, I feel like such a dork.
That paragraph never happened? What paragraph? Exactly . Gosh I'm weird. Starting to have conversations with myself. Let's stop now... 8-)


1:32 PM ; smile'

Dear Dreams,
How am I meant to write a letter to you when I'm not even sure how to address you? This 9is rather difficult. I guess I'd want to thank you for giving me a reason to try and making my future seem somewhat planned. Although, I must say, you scare me. I mean, why must you be so hard to get?
I guess in a way, every one's dreams stem from the basic desire to be happy and yet, when something goes wrong, we feel like it's the end of the world. But then, generally, my default mood is happy and it's out of the ordinary to be UNhappy rather than it being the other way around... am I making sense? probably not...
So to you, my dear dream, thank you for not being as hard to get as I sometimes make you out to be. Yep, once again, I am contradicting myself. For now, let's not specify what exactly it is you are but once I think about it, you really aren't that difficult to obtain. In the end, it all comes down to me and what I'm willing to do to turn you into a reality. Perseverance + determination = YOOOOOOOOOOOOOU. At this point, it would probably be the time to specify what exactly you are. I'm sorry to disappoint but what's life without a little mystery right? ;D
This has been a really pathetic letter :S All about my simplistic views and incompetent writing skills. I'm sorry. I don't know how to write to a dream that lacks certainty. My fear of the unknown becomes intensified when the possibility of failure becomes more and more real. Thinking about my dreams and aspirations makes me realise that the reality isn't necessarily going to be exactly as you dreamed and yet, all i can do is hope.
Love Lots, Kyleen
P.s It's going to be hard, but I can get you. The question is will I?

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1:21 PM ; smile'

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Even though she's so close to me, she's constantly falling in love with other men. She's clumsy and a straight up idiot... But I guess her redeeming feature is her cheerfulness or energy or something. She's obstinate, and she's someone I miss when she's gone. I want to let her go but I just can't tear my eyes away from her.

-Soushi, Absolute Boyfriend

Ian: Samantha I love you.

Samantha: I love you too.

Ian: I wanna tell you why I love you.

Samantha: It's raining. You know that right?

Ian: I need to tell you this and you need to hear it. I've loved you since I met you but I wouldn't allow myself to truly feel it until today. I was always thinking ahead, making decisions out of fear. Today, because of you.. what I learned from you, every choice I made was different and my life has completely changed... and I've learned that if you do that, then you're living your life fully... it doesn't matter if you have five minutes or fifty yeares. Samantha if not for today, if not for you I would never have known love at all... So thankyou for being the person who taught me to love... and to be loved

-If Only


3:53 PM ; smile'

Friday, July 2, 2010

Dear sisters,
So many good memories we've shared. Our relationship is so strong and I love that we can still act kids around each other despite the fact that we're growing up. Thanks for being such good older sisters to me and taking care of me when I needed it. You guys are great :)
Kathleen: four years apart. Big gap.. and yet people think we're twins. What is up with that? D: We have had so many dnms back when we shared a room. I remember one of my holidays, we would have nightly conversations and end up staying up until 3am. Oh those were the days.... I miss being that close to you. I know we've drifted and its most likely because I am an anti social son of a gun at home. But I still tell you everything and you know practically my whole life story.
I know that at times I can be really disrespectful to you but what would a sister be without the sibling rivalry? ;D No seriously, I actualyl have no idea why I'm such a cow to you. TEEN ANGST I SAY ! lol Sometimes I think that you unnecessarily doubt yourself but you know Kathleeny, I have faith in you, so you should too.
Katrina: You have been such an... inspiration I guess. A bit over the top but yknow. I've told you so many times that you're the person I try to impress and your opinion matters to me a lot. You know that your absence affects me a lot. Damn you should know that :P But ig uess i've gotten used to it. AND I have taken over your room >=] muahahahaha. Thankyou for beign such a good educator. You taught me to read when I was three, you've helped me decide which subjects to take and you congratulate me when I do well. You expect a lot from me cause you know think that I can do well. I remember in the Philippines, when it was me you and joel in the room, you were talking to joel about me. I don't think you realised that I wasn't sleeping. I heard every word of what you said and I got teary hearing it :P Thankyou for having that opinion of me :) No matter where you are in the world, you'll still be the one I look up to.
To both of you, thankyou forbeing so motherly. I know it annoyed me sometimes but you guys were really sweet whiel I was growing up. I remember when I was sick, Katrina used to come check up on me the second she got home, gave me medicine/food and made sure everything was ok. Kathleen, you used to make sure I took my medicine at the right times and that I actually DID take them.
And ate, I remember when you were in hospital, I couldn't stand seeing you so weak so I came with dad everyday and catered to your every need. I mean, it was the least I could do after the many times you took care of me when I was sick. And that was a LOT of times.
So Ate and Chi, thankyou for everything you've ever done for me. STicking up for me (occasionally against the other), making sure I was ok and safe and babying me. I know that sounds really weird cause a lot of people dont like to be babied but it made me feel so loved and I wanna thankyou for making me so happy for the past 15 years. You guys aer so sweet and I lovethe relationship we have with each other. Together, we are unstoppable >=] Jamming sessions with you guys are awesome cause I love how we automaticall harmonise. well you guys do cause I cant sing :P
All in all, you guys are awesome, I love you till the very end, thanks for being everythign you are to me and helping me grow up when I needed to.
Love Lots, Kyleeny/ate icecream
P.s. A thousand miles could never change how lucky I feel to have you guys as my sisters ;D (see what i did there ? ;P)

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10:50 PM ; smile'

Death doesn't put an end to love.

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10:50 PM ; smile'

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Omgsh, I am so hopeless its crazy :P In science, we were making DNA models (Yay for arts and crafts in year ten (H)) and we finished with like 10-20 minutes till the end of school so we were all just mucking around, drawing on the whiteboard etc. (Troy, your picture was lovely, but the subtitle was mean !) when I decide to write a bunch of numbers on the board. the whole time I'm like wow this marker is awesome ! So i kept writing and writing.. it was a numerical pattern I learnt from Mr Geerling and Cohen, Bushy, Ukel etc were trying to figure it out. After a while it started to fill ahlf the whiteboard (exaggeration...). The bell went and Jimmy tried rubbing it off. Note; tried. But of course, it was permanent marker. How damn convenient...
So i freaked out cause mr peck has crazy mood swings. But it wasn't that bad. he just said I had to get rid of it before I left. Which was fien cause I didn't need to catch the train anyway. Daniel's a sweetie though. Full stayed back to help me get it all off :P THANKS DANIEL !! HI FIVE TO TEAMWORK YEAH? ;D Stupid Mr peck made me write over half the writing before he goes "wait, I have ethanol!" yeah.. thanks for pointing that out sir. AFTER half of it was gone. Not that I needed it earleir or anything yknow 8-)
And that kids, is the story of the permanent marker and the white board. Quite boring actually but meh. DEAL WITH IT. My blog posts are getting worse and worse :P odd...


7:28 PM ; smile'

The Light Is Where?;

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